The Deranger in Chief

The Deranger in Chief
24 January, 2007 - Congratulations Virginia, you have given the nation a bad mouthpiece with an even worse hair piece in the pugnacious person of Senator Jim Webb. I can sum up the rest of this tome in a few words: what....a...jerk.

Congratulations Virginia, you have given the nation a bad mouthpiece with an even worse hair piece in the pugnacious person of Senator Jim Webb. I can sum up the rest of this tome in a few words: what....a...jerk.

No sooner had the projection lamps on President Bush’s Teleprompter cooled did the Democrats roll out their faux maned Trojan Horse. Webb then proceeded to inform his fellow Hair Club for Men members to disregard anything they had just heard the bumbling idiot from Texas who thinks he’s President say.

Webb said Democrats were not for leaving iraq in chaos and without U.S. troop support but in the next sentence that an orderly withdrawal of all U.S. combat forces must begin, NOW. Then, for good measure he invoked the Berlin Airlift as a symbol of sound U.S. policy in deploying troops thereby shoring up the Democrat’s myopic view that militaries are best used as Meals on Wheels delivery men. Don’t teach that soldier how to shoot, give him a ladle and a salt shaker and teach him how to make grilled cheese sandwiches.

While Webb was busy quoting Dwight Eisenhower and insisting that the Korean War was a stalemate he might have also paid homage by repeating this quote from Ike “Here in America we are descended in blood and in spirit from revolutionists and rebels - men and women who dare to dissent from accepted doctrine. As their heirs, may we never confuse honest dissent with disloyal subversion.” Of course voting for resolutions that proclaim American defeat during an ongoing war is not subversive it’s “supportive” in much the same way you support your local cable company by switching to DirecTV.

Webb peppered his “Ask not what The Hair Club For Men can do for you but what You Can do for it” address by slandering the nations 7th President, the Bold and Brave (Old Hickory) victor at the Battle of New Orleans, Andrew Jackson. Webb opined that “Andrew Jackson established an important principle of American style Democracy that we measure the health of our society not at it’s apex but at it’s base. Not with the numbers that come out of Wall Street but with the living conditions that exist on Main Street.” That’s just not true.

For historical purposes the New York Stock & Exchange existed largely as club, no not a hair club, for men who traded small volumes of stock in small companies. There was most certainly no accounting for the actions of “Wall Street” on “Main Street” because the stock ticker wasn’t even invented until 1867, 30 years after President Jackson left office. It’s impossible to conjure up an image of an Main Street, 1830’s baker returning home after a hard days work demanding to know why the CEO of The Petticoat GAP just cashed $250 worth of stock options, pass the corn fritters please.