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Hey DeceptiCONS: Do We Have to Spread Some American Exceptionalism in Bangladesh?

Mandeville, LA – Exclusive Transcript – I believe somewhere in my closet at home, I have at least one shirt that was sewn together by the people of Bangladesh.  They’re big into textiles.  Should we get together and have a Bangladesh burning party?  We’ll all get our fabrics and shirts together and anything that has been made in Bangladesh.  I think I bought the Bangladeshi shirt because I try not to buy anything that’s made in China, and it’s almost impossible to do.  If I can find an alternative that was made in South America or made in South Carolina — I always look for the Made in the USA brand first.  I’m not obsessive or possessive over it.  I’m pretty sure I have clothing that has been made in Bangladesh.  This is a major problem for many of you.  You decepticons out there, those of you that think we need to expand our empire and occupy more places in the world because they all want to kill us, that every Muslim alive wants to kill us and destroy our way of life, you’ve got a whole new country to deal with. Check out the rest in today’s transcript…

 

Begin Mike Church Show Transcript

Mike:  Lindsey Graham was on last night with — I went to an event last night and I was driving home.  Greta Van Susteren was on Fox News and she had Lindsey Graham on.  As if I wasn’t nauseous enough — and I’ll tell you about that in just a moment — I had to suffer through that, and listening to [mocking] “It’s because America’s presence in the world has declined under this administration.  We’re not any safer than we were.”  I have a question about the Federal Reserve bomber.  He’s from Bangladesh, right, AG?  He’s a Bangladeshi kid, 21 years old, right?

AG:  Correct.

Mike:  What country is Bangladesh in?  India?  Bangladesh is not in Iraq, I don’t think.  Bangladesh is not in Libya, I don’t think.  Bangladesh is not in Afghanistan, I’m pretty sure.  Wait a minute, if this kid was from Bangladesh, it would seem then that the Bangladeshis would be in need of some American exceptionalism, don’t you think?  We need to get an aircraft carrier or an aircraft carrier battalion steaming and on the way to surround Bangladesh.  We’ve obviously got a new threat to deal with.

Wait, wait, wait, I thought I had read somewhere that if we fought the terrorists over there — I want to make sure that I say this correctly — that if we fought the terrorists over there, we wouldn’t have to fight them over here.  I think I did hear that somewhere, I did.  I did, I did, I did see a puddy tat!  We fought a war over this.  Wait, we spent $3 trillion fighting on their field so that we wouldn’t have to fight on — we must have this news incorrect.  This guy has got to be a plant.  He cannot possibly be a real Bangladeshi, can he?  If so, what is our foreign policy to Bangladesh?  I’m just curious.  Anyone out there ever been to Bangladesh?  I must confess I’ve never traveled outside the United States.  Well, I’ve been to Canada.  I went to Niagara Falls, Canada.  I don’t know if that counts.  Do you think going to the Canadian side of Niagara Falls counts that I can claim I’m a foreign traveler?

AG:  That is tough.

Mike:  Have you been outside the country?

AG:  Yep.

Mike:  What is the extent of your foreign experience?

AG:  A bunch of different Caribbean islands for basketball tournaments.

Mike:  Really?

AG:  Yeah.  In high school we traveled to the Virgin Islands to play basketball.

Mike:  So Bangladesh is actually its own country.

AG:  Yep.

Mike:  It’s a little country surrounded by West Bengal, Meghalaya, Bhutan, Tripura, Mizoram.

AG:  East of India.

Mike:  It is east of India.  I think that they are in need of some serious American exceptionalism.  We can actually surround them — I think we can get away with just one aircraft carrier and a couple little frigates.  What do you think?  It’s not that large of an area there.  We have brand-new problems cropping up here in the form of Bangladeshi terrorists.  Now we just have to expand the reach of the empire, right, Decepticons?  Obviously the people of Bangladesh all want to kill us now.  This is the mindset that we must develop.

Wait, wait, wait, this is really disturbing now, Andrew.  I believe somewhere in my closet at home, I have at least one shirt that was sewn together by the people of Bangladesh.  They’re big into textiles.  Should we get together and have a Bangladesh burning party?  We’ll all get our fabrics and shirts together and anything that has been made in Bangladesh.  I think I bought the Bangladeshi shirt because I try not to buy anything that’s made in China, and it’s almost impossible to do.  If I can find an alternative that was made in South America or made in South Carolina — I always look for the Made in the USA brand first.  I’m not obsessive or possessive over it.  I’m pretty sure I have clothing that has been made in Bangladesh.  This is a major problem for many of you.  You decepticons out there, those of you that think we need to expand our empire and occupy more places in the world because they all want to kill us, that every Muslim alive wants to kill us and destroy our way of life, you’ve got a whole new country to deal with.  I wonder if this is going to come up in Tuesday night’s debate.

End Mike Church Show Transcript

 

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4 Responses
  1. Alex

    Mike, nothing of what you said makes any sense. You sound exactly like the Gary Johnson/Ron Paul/Obama drones (yes, all three of those guys are your typical liberal progressives). I’m not a big fan of Lindsay Graham but he has a point here. Under the obama administration, America’s presence HAS declined around the world. WE ARE NO LONGER A SUPERPOWER! Since obama has practically ruined this economy, our military has faced severe budget cuts and will continue to do so if he is re-elected. These drastic budget cuts weaken our military and therefore, we lack the military strength to deter any possible attacks against America. If we had a strong president and a strong military with the best equipment, enemies would think twice before messing with us. Unfortunately, that is not the case. No one fears us and terrorists that would very much love to slit all our throats are laughing at us and probably planning on another way to attack us right now as we speak! Why has our presence declined around the world? Besides the drastic budget cuts our military has experienced, it is also because obama is a weak leader who leads from behind, one who runs away from problems rather than confronting them and then tries to cover up everything when he loses complete control of the situation, such as the recent situation in Libya. He is such a weak leader that rogue leaders like Vladimir Putin and Mahmoud Ahmadinejad laugh at him, mock him, step all over him and easily manipulate him so they can do whatever they want while making sure that America cannot do anything to stop them. That , sir, is why we have witnessed events such as the Benghazi terrorist attack and now the attempted Federal Reserve bombing unfoil. It is because we have become a weak and divided nation and because we have such a weak president who never confronts problems and quite frankly, isn’t a leader but is actually a wimp.

    1. TheKingDude

      So to recap: Bin Ghazi was attacked because of a limp/impotent American military NOT because Obama used the U.S. military to destroy Libya’s legitimate government and assist in assassinating it’s leader Mohmar Ghadaffi? Why were al Queda mobs roaming the streets of bin Ghazi acting as though THEY were the government? Because they basically ARE the government, this is the result of direct intervention in Libya’s affairs which I presume from the bellicose nature of your note, you must approve of. Our “military budget” is 43% of what the known universe spends on military but that’s not enough is it? The $1.2 TRILLION in total defense spending is = to “sever budget cuts”!?

      Tell me, when over 6,200 men have died and $2.5 TRILLION has been spent “as a superpower” in the “region where our closest ally, Israel, exists” why is there MORE al queda and more jihad chaos than ever before? If you are going to mock Obama for the NY Fed attack and how his weakness caused it do you propose to stop a future attack by doing to Bangladesh what we have done to Iraq, Yemen, Afghanistan, Libya and Somalia?

      Calling those of us who respect other peoples and nations rights to exist “Liberal Progressives” serves only to rile up other immature, war thirsty, Jacobins (see the French Revolution) to chant USA, USA. As Scott McConnel writes of your POV “Monday in the Wall Street Journal, Bret Stephens reassured readers that if Romney were elected “we won’t have another war in the Middle East.” Not even, he added “if President Romney orders Iran’s nuclear sites to be bombed to smithereens.”

      Stephens apparently assumes his readers are sufficiently dense to believe that Iran would not respond if its nuclear sites were bombed to smithereens; i.e, no closure of the Gulf to shipping, no rockets fired into Haifa, no long delayed terrorism riposte. He presumably is aware that striking underground nuclear reactors would create major collateral damage, unleashing toxic plumes into neighboring cities, and killing or maiming as many as 70,000 Iranians according to one recent study performed by the University of Utah’s Hinckley Institute of Politics. I would surmise that for Stephens, and for whoever leaked the limited strike scenario to Rothkopf, the maiming of innocent Iranian civilians is considered a collateral plus, because it would poison relations between the United States and Iran for a generation–to the benefit of our ties with America’s “only ally in the Middle East.” But it’s not clear that Americans want more blood on their hands, or desire the lasting enmity of the Middle Eastern nation with the largest middle class, modern tastes, and indeed, most latently pro-American values.

      The War Party, Take Two–of which Stephens and Michael Oren are charter members– know full well that, after Iraq, the war they want can’t be sold straightforwardly again. So they’re trying a little bait and switch. Not real war, heaven forbid. Just a little “surgical” bombing.”

      1. Alex

        There you go again. Mike, I never said I supported obama’s involvement in Arab Spring. In fact, I wish he would have done something to prevent the Muslim Brotherhood from overthrowing Gadaffi in Libya and Mubarak in Egypt. But, as usual, he led from behind and he let the Muslim Brotherhood overtake these countries. Now look at the situation: COMPLETE CHAOS! In an episode of Hannity, Sean said last year when all this was happening that he had a bad feeling about this and that it would only be a matter of time before this backfired and obama lost complete control. I agreed with him too since it reminded me of the 1979 Iranian Revolution and low and behold, Sean was absolutely right!

        Again, you Ron Paul/Gary Johnson progressives always assume that Al-Qaeda is present because of our intervention in the Middle East and North Africa. WHAT IS IT WITH YOU GUYS AND THIS BLAME AMERICA FIRST NONSENSE?? SERIOUSLY?? HAVE YOU GUYS BEEN BRAINWASHED BY ALL THE OTHER LIBERALS?? Al-Qaeda does not want to kill us because we have been “intervening” in Muslim nations for decades. AS I have said before, it is because the West is typically in favor of personal freedom, pro-Israel, supports equal rights for women rather than treating them as objects, etc. and because that is what the west represents, they can’t stand that. They hate our freedoms and would very much love to wipe us out so that they can control the entire world. THAT IS WHY GROUPS SUCH AS AL-QAEDA FORM AND ATTACK US! STOP WITH THIS BLAME AMERICA FIRST GARBAGE!

        NO ONE is saying that we should attack Bangladesh. Like I said, terrorists can come from any country, including Mexico and Canada. But there are countries that do sponsor terrorism and those are countries that we have to deal with in order to protect our freedoms. Negotiating with terrorists is NOT an option. No one is saying that we should bomb Iran either! However, Gov. Romney and other conservatives are not willing to take the military option off the table yet, if elected (God willing). And if we did have to resort towards military action towards Iran, it would have to be carefully planned due to many factors such as the topography, terrorist groups, the hazards involved with the nuclear material being processed, etc.

        You’re crazy if you think that we Conservatives “want” another war. The last thing we want is another war! But we can’t let Iran acquire nuclear weapons. You need to seriously stop with this “blame America first” nonsense if you want to keep your current listeners instead of driving them away.

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