Mandeville, LA – It will be a very uncomfortable day for some future victim of a Medieval-obsessed racist to discover that though the Iron Maiden was stored safely in a museum, when called upon it was as lethal when closed with its victim entombed inside as it was when Queen Elizabeth gave up the torture of Catholics in the 16th century. Such will be the fate of what newly diploma’d, civil war historian Senator Rand Paul calls the “symbol of human bondage and slavery”, the battle flag under which Virginians identified their troops to prevent from shooting them with friendly fire. “Back in the day,” when the outraged had the courage of the rage part of emotionalism, they might have burned all the lethal flags publicly, but fire being likely to draw too heavily on public resources let’s instead entrust 98 lb museum curators with placing under lock and key the racial equivalent of a neutron bomb.
Genius, Senator, what could possibly go wrong or stated differently will you be in row 2 or 3 when the bonfire is called for when the next mob needs a poly-cotton sacrifice/fix?
Gilbert Keith Chesterton couldn’t possibly have known civilized man could become less civilized and more stupid then he already was after killing 14 million in WWI when he wrote. “Men talk for hours with the faces of a college of cardinals about things like golf, or tobacco, or waistcoats, or party politics. But all the most grave and dreadful things in the world are the oldest jokes in the world–being married; being hanged;… humanity stands at a solemn parting of the ways. Towards some unknown goal it presses through the ages, impelled by an overmastering desire of happiness. Today it hesitates, lightheartedly enough, but every serious thinker knows how momentous the decision may be. It is, apparently, deserting the path of religion and entering upon the path of secularism.”
No religion, save for Islam could possibly find a more imbecilic method to convey its intellectual impotence then this one of Americanism for entrusting the future of race relations to Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson. Meanwhile, Senator Paul, if you’re looking for the actual, universal symbol of bondage, slavery, heresy and murder, this is it: